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Green Tea 8, Jelly Baby 9, Pineapple 8

Author: rustydragonfly
Challenge: Green Tea 8 (prime time), Jelly Baby 9 (I wear a/an _____ now. ____s are cool.), Pineapple 8 (I don't want to know)
Toppings: chopped nuts, gummy bunnies (trope_bingo round 1 card: au: hooker / porn / stripper), cherry (I wrote a what AU now?)
Extras: pocky chain
Wordcount: 500
Rating: teen and up (there's no real porn, but it's pretty obvious what's going on)
Story: Manifestations (Crack Pornstar AU)
Summary: The adventures of up and coming er... star... Pewter Zero, as seen through the eyes of his brother, who'd really rather be somewhere else. Anywhere else.
Notes: I don't even know, except that I'm laying the blame for this one on my other half, because it was their idea to take that bingo square. Otherwise... I just don't know. And don't ask where they got all that recording equipment either.

“This isn’t going to work,” Jen said. “For starters, we didn’t grow up on a street.”

“But Mother had a cat!” Dhaymin protested.

“Doesn’t matter. You can’t be called Pewter Nothing.”

“No rule says I have to be Pewter Nothing. I can just embellish it.” Dhaymin got to his feet, pacing as he voiced his thoughts, while Jen contemplated their situation and decided he didn’t want to think of it. “Nothing. No Name. Nameless. Nothing. Zero.” He stopped, frozen in place. “Zero. Pewter Zero.”

Jen held his head in his hands. It was going to be a long, long day.


“Who writes this?” Jen said, tilting the paper. A little too late, he realised he wasn’t alone, and turned around. “Oh,” he said. “It’s you, isn’t it?”

“Couldn’t be anyone else.” Rosa plucked the script from his hands. “Don’t worry. It’s not meant to be great. Nobody’s watching this for deathless dialogue. Though Vesin’s been giving me some good suggestions... anyway, what are you doing? You’re the last person I’d expect to see round here.”

“I’m... I’m doing the filming.” Jen scratched the back of his neck, and looked away.

Rosa tried to hide her laughter. It didn’t really help.


“Let me get this straight,” Jen said, hauling over the camera. “I’m not objecting to what you want to do for money. But do you think you can keep your clothes on until we start the actual filming?”

“I’ve got a blindfold.”

“That’s not clothes and you know it!” said Jen, who was now trying to immerse himself in manuals and settings and various other technical details that didn’t involve nudity whatsoever, at least not most of the time.

“Pewter Zero has no time for clothing!”

“And Dhaymin Dhalsiv?”

“Couldn’t give a toss either.”

“Yeah. I was afraid of that.”


Jen heard a mouse click, followed by the sort of noise that he’d heard an awful lot of these last few days. It was followed again by an exasperated grumble, which he took as his cue to nudge open the door. “I got coffee.”

“That’s good. Mind pouring it over the computer?”

Jen placed two mugs, steaming hot and smelling of caffeine loaded goodness, on the desk, pulled up a chair, and tried not to look too much at what was on the screen. “Timeline giving you trouble?”

“You,” Bala said, her chin cupped in one hand, “have no idea.”


It really was just a job, when you got down to it. It wasn’t the job he’d have picked, but at least he got to be on the better side of the camera. Not that Dhaymin would agree, but he never would. Once you got used to it, it was just another thing to do.

“Hey Jen!” Dhaymin called out.

“Put some-” Jen started, and then went silent. “Nevermind. Why am I asking? Hi, Dhaymin.”

“That’s Pewter Zero, to you.”

There were some things he wasn’t going to get used to. And some things that were never going to change...


( 6 comments — Leave a comment )
Feb. 8th, 2013 04:07 am (UTC)
Hahahahahaha!!! =D

Can totally see this. Of course Dhaymin just wears a blindfold now! I salute your epic (non)porn writing skills :)
Mar. 2nd, 2013 10:16 pm (UTC)
All the other Dhaymins across the multiverse would do the same, this one so happens to be the one who CAN. And he will enjoy every second of it.
Feb. 8th, 2013 05:17 am (UTC)
“Pewter Zero has no time for clothing!”

Killed me. Slayed me dead. Brb laughing until I spontaneously resurrect.
Mar. 2nd, 2013 10:19 pm (UTC)
You know he doesn't. He's got too many important things to do than worry about CLOTHES.

Also it's not like he has to look at it.
Feb. 11th, 2013 04:05 am (UTC)
Poor Jen.

But so amusing for the rest of us.
Mar. 2nd, 2013 10:19 pm (UTC)
Jen's pain makes the MFSverse go round...
( 6 comments — Leave a comment )


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